Things We Needed To Say
by scabbedangel
Summary: Jimmy and Kim are back together. Kim's having trouble believing that Jimmy has changed.


Disclaimer: I don't own Third watch or any of it's character's

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Kim woke up and looked next top her. She saw that Jimmy was still asleep. Sometimes she felt she was making a mistake for being with him again. It was Jimmy. He always did something to screw things up and hurt both her and Joey. She didn't know if she could do this again. She was really trying. But all she could think about was all the things he's done in the past. Sleeping with her sister. And all the other times he's cheated on her. She just didn't know if she could really trust him again. She wanted to so bad. She still loved him. A part of her had never stopped loving him. She also knew she'd never be able to say these things to Jimmy. He'd just get upset. He wouldn't understand where she was coming from and why she couldn't get over it. It was just so hard sometimes. Being with Jimmy made her feel great, but at the same time so scared. She looked back over at Jimmy and saw that he was awake. She gave him a small smile.

"What's wrong? You look upset," Jimmy asked. He could tell that she had something on her mind. She looked so worried. So upset. Like she was torn between whatever she was thinking about. He just hoped it wasn't about him. He would never be able to live with himself if he had hurt Kim again. He just loved her too much. He wasn't going to mess this up again. He was finally happy. He finally had Kim and Joey back in his life completely. He didn't want to lose them.

"Nothing's wrong. I was just thinking about something," Kim replied softly. She looked away from Jimmy. She knew she should really tell him what she was thinking about. She just couldn't bring herself to do it. She was so scared he wouldn't understand and that he would leave her at the same time. He just couldn't know what she was thinking about. He couldn't know that she still didn't trust him. That every time he was just a little late she was always thinking the worst. And whenever he said he was out with the guys she thought he was with another girl. He just wouldn't understand.

"Kimmy, Just tell me what's wrong. Whatever it is, I won't get upset. I promise," Jimmy said softly. He hated seeing her like this. He knew that something was wrong. He just really wanted to know. He wanted to try and make it better. He wanted to know that she was okay. Cause right now she didn't look okay. She looked like a mess with too many demons going through her head. He just needed to know she was okay and that it wasn't anything bad.

"Jimmy, really. There's nothing wrong. I'm fine. I told you. I'm just thinking. It's nothing you need to know. Just go back to sleep. I'm going to go check on Joey," Kim replied in a worried tone. She really wanted to tell him the truth. But she couldn't. She just couldn't do that to him. She knew that if she told him it would only hurt him. She gave Jimmy a soft kiss on his cheek and got out of bed. She just needed to be alone right now. She needed some time to think. She'd have to tell jimmy at some point. Now just wasn't the right time. Things were just starting to go good fro them and Joey was asleep in the next room. It just wasn't the right time. She wasn't ready to tell hi yet and she felt so bad for keeping this from him. She just hoped that when she did tell him, that he would understand and he wouldn't be hurt by it. That was the last thing she wanted to do. She knew he was trying so hard to change. And that he hasn't done anything yet to lose her trust. But she couldn't help but think that it was going to happen soon. That he was going to hurt her and Joey. And she hated feeling this. She hated thinking that.

Kim sat down at the kitchen table pouring some apple juice into her cup. She really needed a drink, but she hasn't had a drink since the whole bath tub incident. She wouldn't let her self get that bad again. She heard someone sit down next to her. She saw Jimmy look at her. He was worried about her. She could tell. And she felt so bad for doing this to him. Maybe she was wrong. Maybe now was the right time to tell him. When they were in the beginning of their relationship. Rather than too far into it. She just had to tell him the truth. She couldn't keep hiding this from him.

"Kimmy, talk to me. Please. I'm so worried about you. You keep saying you're okay, but I can tell that there's something wrong. Just please tell me. I promise I won't get upset and I'll understand. Whatever it is I'll understand. Just please talk to me. Let me in," Jimmy pleaded. He just needed to know that everything was okay. He took her hand in his in looked into her sad eyes. She looked like she was about to cry.

"I'm so sorry Jimmy. I'm trying so hard to believe that you changed. And I know that you have. But it's so hard to believe that you won't go back to your old ways again. Every time you come home late or say you're hanging out with the guys I get so worried that you're going to go back to how things used to be. And it's not fair to you. It's fair to you that I don't believe in you and that all I've been doing is doubting you. You deserve better than this. You deserve someone that trusts you and doesn't doubt you

everyday," Kim cried out. She couldn't help it. She felt so bad. He didn't deserve her always doubting him and not believing him. She looked up at Jimmy. She could tell that he was hurt. She felt so much worse now. He'd probably leave her and she wouldn't blame him. He did deserve better than this. He deserved to be happy and to not have to try and prove everyday that he had changed. It just wasn't right.

"Kim, it's okay. I know that you're worried about that. I can see it in your eyes when I come home and awake on the couch waiting for me. But I don't care about that. I love you too much to care about that. I just want the chance to prove to you that I won't hurt you. That's all I want. I like having you and Joey back in my life. I like us being a family again. I just want to see you happy. But I guess I'm not making you happy. All I seem to be doing is hurting you and making you worry about things you shouldn't have to worry about. Maybe us being together again just isn't right. I don't like seeing you upset like this. I don't like seeing you too scared to tell me what's on your mind. I just want you to be happy. Maybe I should leave," Jimmy replied. He let go of Kim's hand and gave her a soft kiss on the lips. He felt so bad that she was going through this. Sometimes the best thing to do when you love someone is to let them go. Maybe things would be better this way. They could still be friends. They could still tell each other everything. He just hoped that she would be happy. All he wanted was to see her happy. Jimmy looked at Kim and then turned to leave. He just hoped she'd finally be able to be happy. That she'd finally be able to move on without him. He wasn't going to hold her back from living her life anymore. He was just going to let her go. He quietly closed the door behind him. He didn't even look back. He couldn't.

Kim sat in the chair. She felt tears falling down her face. She didn't want Jimmy to leave. She didn't want to lose him. And she didn't want to doubt him anymore. She could tell he was serious this time. He just proved it. She knew she had made a mistake. She got out of the chair and ran outside to catch up with Jimmy.

"Jimmy wait," Kim yelled out. She saw him turn. She saw the tears in his eyes. She knew he didn't want to leave either. She just hoped it wasn't too late.

"Yeah," He said softly.

"Don't leave Jimmy. I don't want you to leave. We can make this work. I know we can. We always have. Please don't leave," Kim pleaded. She watched Jimmy walk closer to her.

"Are you sure that this is what you want?" Jimmy asked. He hoped this was what she wanted. He didn't want to leave. He just wanted her happy.

"I'm sure," Kim replied. Jimmy pulled her into his arms and she smiled at him. She was just happy that things did work out. She loved him to much to be without him. And she knew that this time he wouldn't hurt her. He'd changed. He changed for her. They were just meant to be together.

The End


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